I believe that it takes two to fight and it definitely takes two to make a relationship work. I know a lot of people out there that don't understand that it does take two to make things work and that not everyone is perfect. Every couple out there has their battles, I mean who doesn't? The key to a relationship is communication, trust and of course love. I know my husband and I have had our fights, but we come out of it stronger. It has taken a long time for us to be able to communicate on a level that we can both agree to. But we never gave up on each other, we never make empty threats to one another. We have faith in each other to work it out, not only for us but for our children. In relationships, especially when you have children involved, you have to learn to make sacrifices and compromises with each other to make things work.
We had our first son when we were young, I was 19 and he was 21. But we have never felt like we missed out on our lives. We still live our lives the way we want to and it works for us because we communicate and trust each other. I admit, having kids changes EVERYTHING, it truly does. But its a good thing, the kids keep us young at heart. With my husband and I, we don't feel the need to go out every single weekend with our friends, once a month maybe, or on a special occasion. We love spending time with the kids, especially the twins, they are hilarious especially at their age they are learning how to talk and mimic you. Who would want to miss out on their kids growing up? I sure don't.
I'm a stay at home mom so I know what it feels like to be left at home with the kids all day and night. I don't get to go to happy hour after work with co workers and friends, but I am okay with that. All I need from my other half is to know he's safe and he'll be home soon. I don't feel the need to know where he's at 24/7 because I'm keeping a gps tracker on him, not the case at all. For me, I just need to know that he's okay where ever he is at and that's all there is to it. When he has his guy time, I let him have his guy time and I hardly call him at all unless its an emergency. Why don't I call him 15 times to bug him when he's coming home? Because I don't want him to call me when I'm out with my girlfriends. Plain and simple. I don't want my husband to be a human backpack and I don't want to be a human backpack to him. We did live separate lives before getting married, and had other friends before meeting each other. So yeah we both do need our away time from each other. It gives us a chance to miss each other. You have to have trust in one another as well, if you don't have trust in your relationship, then you don't have a relationship at all.
I love my husband for who he is. He doesn't treat me the way I don't want to be treated. He's not a human backpack, thank goodness lol. He loves me unconditionally and I feel the same way about him. We work through our issues, we talk about them and we listen to each other. We FORGIVE and FORGET about what's happened in the past. People who can't forget and forget, well they will never get over the past and will keep bringing it up and its like a never ending cycle. Why put yourself through that torture? If you aren't happy, then figure out what will make you happy in your relationship.
So for all of you that are looking for love in their relationship, let me tell you, it doesn't come knocking at your door when you want it to. Love doesn't come easy, love hurts and love is blind. But all in all, its worth falling in love. It's worth being with your boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife and partner for life. Knowing that they will be there for you when you need them the most, is probably one of the best parts of being in a relationship. Having someone there for you, a shoulder to cry on, to love and care about you and knowing that this is the person you want to grow old with and reminisce about all the good times, is the best feeling ever.
So cherish what you have with your loved one, because you will never find the same love again. No one is the same and no one is perfect. Cherish the fact that you have someone that loves you deeply, because honestly, it could be worse. You think you might have it bad with your loved one now, but I am sure there are people out there that have it worse than you think. Be positive and act positive if you want a positive outcome. One can only take in so much pain and heart ache before they give up completely. Remember it takes TWO to fight and it takes TWO to make it work.